Jane Heller

New York Times and USA Today Bestselling Author

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ALDS Game 2: Max Scherzer? Really?

October 2, 2011

Photo: Nick Laham/Getty Images North America

According to Friend of the Blog Nadine, “Scherzer” means “joke” in German. (See what you learn on twitter?)

Unfortunately, I wasn’t laughing at the way the Tigers’ starter was no-hitting the Yankees for much of today’s game. In  fact, it made me downright mental. I reverted back to my old superstitious ways – from changing positions on the couch to yelling “No-Hitter! No-Hitter! No Hitter!” in an attempt to lay a jinx on the guy.

Nothing worked until Cano’s bloop single. And our offense couldn’t really get anything going after that, homers by Grandy and Swisher and Jorge’s triple aside.

Some in the crowd at the Stadium booed A-Rod. And while I was frustrated with his at-bats too, I wanted to strangle every person in the Bronx who calls himself/herself a fan. My God. He’s playing hurt, plus he had plenty of company in the rally killing department.

I didn’t have huge expectations for Garcia and actually thought he pitched pretty well after the first inning, although I didn’t understand the wisdom of pitching to Cabrera. It was Jeter’s error that opened the door for the later runs and perhaps Girardi left Sweaty Freddy in too long.

What I don’t get was the use of Ayala. I’ve made no secret of my lack of faith in him so I wasn’t happy to see him – even though the Yankees did have a hill to climb (which they almost did climb against Valverde). Girardi defended his choice of reliever by saying, “We have to play back to back games.” Or something like that. So the skipper was, what, saving the good relievers? Isn’t this the postseason when every game is do-or-die? When you worry about tomorrow tomorrow? When you really, truly try to win now? They can all rest in November.

Having Chavez pinch-hit for Gardner was also a headscratcher, but Joe said he was going by the numbers. *Shrug*

Oh, and one other thing. I won’t do a full-on rant about the TBS/TNT broadcasters; they’re inept but they’re not as obnoxious as the guys on FOX/ESPN. My issue is with the network’s camera choices. Did we really need a shot of Leyland in the dugout every six seconds? Was I watching a Tigers telecast instead of the ALDS? What was all that about?

Yes, I’m grouchy. And I felt sorry for the Yanks that they had to play in the rain yet again. I don’t exactly think of Detroit as Sunnyville, USA, but maybe the weather will be better there. We can hope.

Filed Under: Confessions of a She-Fan Tagged With: A-Rod, Freddy Garcia, Luis Ayala, Max Scherzer, TBS, Tigers, TNT, Yankees

ALDS Game 1: The Ivan Nova Show

October 1, 2011

Photo: Corey Sipkin/Daily News

Wow. What a performance. When Nova came out of the game, the crowd at the Stadium gave him a huge ovation. So did I. I got up off the couch and stood there applauding in my living room.

The Tigers helped, swinging at pitches in the dirt, but that was part of Nova’s magic: his ball moved all over the place. The Yankees’ defense also contributed. I’m still marveling at Jeter’s relay to Martin at the plate, for example; it was sheer perfection.

Of course, tonight’s win could also be called The Robbie Cano Show.

Photo: Bill Kostroun/AP

Six RBIs. Seriously. Do you think he likes batting third? Actually, he probably doesn’t care where he is in the lineup, but I love him in that spot. I would expect the Tigers to start pitching around him, given that A-Rod isn’t 100%, but we’ll see.

Overall, the Yankees just played great baseball tonight. No complaints. Well, except one. Okay, two. There was Posada’s base running mishap. Sigh. And there was this guy.

Photo: Getty Images

I realize Ayala pitched well over the course of the season but lately? Not so much. When he came in for the ninth and couldn’t get the job done, I had flashbacks to the other night at the Trop. What a shame to have to bring Mo into the game in that situation, but our savior took care of business with cool efficiency.

So. We won the first one. Whew. It feels fantastic, doesn’t it? I’m doing a happy dance right now.

Filed Under: Confessions of a She-Fan Tagged With: ALDS 2011, Derek Jeter, Ivan Nova, Jorge Posada, Luis Ayala, Robinson Cano, Tigers, Yankees

That Was Not Fun To Watch

August 31, 2011

Photo: Getty Images

And by “that,” I mean everything that happened after the Yankees scored five runs giving Hughes a lead over the Sox and Josh Beckett. (Yup, I got the power back in my house this afternoon and I’m happy about that, at least.)

It was so distressing to see Hughes hand the lead right back. But here’s who else was distressing:

Varitek.

Ellsbury.

Ortiz.

Logan.

Ayala.

Tex. (Sorry, but I’m tired of his pop-ups.)

And, of course, Beckett, who probably bores opposing hitters to death the way he takes forever to release the ball. I wouldn’t blame anybody for falling asleep waiting for him to pitch.

Here’s who was not distressing:

Jeter.

Cano.

Chavez.

Nunez.

I wish I were a bigger Phil Hughes fan. He didn’t pitch horribly. I just have no confidence when he’s on the mound. Girardi’s post-game comment – “I thought Hughes threw the ball pretty decent tonight” – didn’t inspire confidence either. “Pretty decent” isn’t good enough in a tight pennant race.

Filed Under: Confessions of a She-Fan Tagged With: Boone Logan, David Ortiz, Jacoby Ellsbury, Jason Varitek, Josh Beckett, Luis Ayala, Phil Hughes, Red Sox, Yankees

It Could Have Been Worse

June 7, 2011

Yes, we could have had a Buster Posey situation on our hands.

Tell me you didn’t hold your break and think about Posey when Lester’s pitch made a direct hit on Tex’s knee. I heard that crack, watched our guy go down and felt sick. But the x-rays were negative and he’s got a contusion and nothing’s broken. At least that’s what we heard tonight. How long he’ll be out remains a question mark. And just when he’d gone on a home run streak too. Figures.

What further bothered me was that despite Lester’s lack of control (he hit Martin to add insult to injury), the Yankees couldn’t knock him out earlier. They couldn’t even take advantage after Jenks went lame with a stiff back. Just not enough firepower tonight. A-Rod, in particular, was not helpful. Granderson had an atypically off night at the plate. And Andruw Jones looked ready for the glue factory.

Should I even bother to talk about Garcia? Oh, why not. He was throwing batting practice. He had nothing. I know he’s pitched well and I’m not supposed to complain about him but I’m doing it anyway. He’s not the answer over the long haul, he just isn’t.

On a positive note, how about Hector Noesi?!

Photo: Nick Laham/Getty Images - bleacherreport.com

Aside from Big Sloppy’s homer, he was brilliant. Who wants to see him in the rotation?

(courtesy: villagevoice.com)

Kudos to Ayala too.

And Jorge. Clearly, all he needed was to play defense instead of just DH. He had a terrific night. So if he takes over at first for awhile, maybe we’ll see some real offense from him.

And a word about Cano and that throw he made from Granderson to nail Ellsbury at third: sweet.

I hate losing to the Red Sox yet again, especially at the Stadium. I hate losing one of our hottest players too. But there’s always tomorrow and Thursday.

I’m being amazingly level-headed about all this, aren’t I?

Filed Under: Confessions of a She-Fan Tagged With: Buster Posey, Freddy Garcia, Hector Noesi, Jon Lester, Luis Ayala, Mark Teixeira, Red Sox, Yankees

If You Didn't Stay Up For Tonight's Game, Consider Yourself Lucky

May 27, 2011

What a boring few hours.

The Yankees lost to a team with no offense – a team that scored all its runs on ground-outs.

A.J. had 97 pitches through five innings (or something like that), thanks to numerous walks. He didn’t implode, however, and held the M’s in check even when they threatened.

Our bullpen, on the other hand, coughed up a couple of runs of their own. I’m talking about Boone and Ayala. Why Girardi didn’t call for Robertson with bases loaded and nobody out – Robertson being the guy whose specialty is getting us out of those situations – is beyond me. I guess his binder told him it was only the sixth inning. Jeez. Way to not use your gut, Joe.

Our inability to score with men on base continues to baffle. Almost everybody looked pathetic at the plate, despite the lack of command by the Mariners’ highly touted rookie pitcher Pineda. But the most painful thing to watch for me was when Nunez went in to pinch-run for Jorge, stole second, then got picked off. The kid was asleep at the switch and it made me mad.

Maybe it was all my fault. The Yankees were ahead in the game when I got greedy. It had been a warm, sunny day here in Santa Barbara – our first real taste of summer – and I said to Michael, “Let’s get some hot fudge sundaes.”

He thought it was a great idea, got in the car and drove off to our local place, picked up the sundaes and brought them home. Just as we started to eat them, Boone/Ayala gave up the lead. So I blame myself…and these.

iStockphoto/Frankin Lugenbeel

Filed Under: Confessions of a She-Fan Tagged With: A.J. Burnett, Boone Logan, Dave Robertson, hot fudge sundae, Joe Girardi, Luis Ayala, Mariners, Yankees

If You Didn’t Stay Up For Tonight’s Game, Consider Yourself Lucky

May 27, 2011

What a boring few hours.

The Yankees lost to a team with no offense – a team that scored all its runs on ground-outs.

A.J. had 97 pitches through five innings (or something like that), thanks to numerous walks. He didn’t implode, however, and held the M’s in check even when they threatened.

Our bullpen, on the other hand, coughed up a couple of runs of their own. I’m talking about Boone and Ayala. Why Girardi didn’t call for Robertson with bases loaded and nobody out – Robertson being the guy whose specialty is getting us out of those situations – is beyond me. I guess his binder told him it was only the sixth inning. Jeez. Way to not use your gut, Joe.

Our inability to score with men on base continues to baffle. Almost everybody looked pathetic at the plate, despite the lack of command by the Mariners’ highly touted rookie pitcher Pineda. But the most painful thing to watch for me was when Nunez went in to pinch-run for Jorge, stole second, then got picked off. The kid was asleep at the switch and it made me mad.

Maybe it was all my fault. The Yankees were ahead in the game when I got greedy. It had been a warm, sunny day here in Santa Barbara – our first real taste of summer – and I said to Michael, “Let’s get some hot fudge sundaes.”

He thought it was a great idea, got in the car and drove off to our local place, picked up the sundaes and brought them home. Just as we started to eat them, Boone/Ayala gave up the lead. So I blame myself…and these.

iStockphoto/Frankin Lugenbeel

Filed Under: Confessions of a She-Fan Tagged With: A.J. Burnett, Boone Logan, Dave Robertson, hot fudge sundae, Joe Girardi, Luis Ayala, Mariners, Yankees

A Game Of Two Emoticons

May 22, 2011

For the first six innings of today’s Yankees-Mets finale, I was wearing this face.

Nova was pitching in and out of trouble and, aside from Granderson’s latest display of brute force, the offense was in sleep mode. I feared another sloppy game.

But then came the seventh inning and this face emerged.

Oh, boy. Who says all the Yankees can do is swat homers? A bunch of dunkers, rollers, nubbers, plus a walk here and a hit batsman there, and suddenly we had sent Pelfrey to the showers and blown the thing open.

Maybe I need to revisit my initial opinion of Ayala, by the way. He has quietly gotten the job done lately. And look at Jeter inching closer to the magic #3,000. Good to see.

On the negative side (well, I don’t need to dwell on this, but I do need to mention it), Posada has the base-running instincts of, say, a crocodile.

Why did Girardi have Granderson, our hottest hitter, bunt? Oh, who knows. Maybe his binder told him it was the way to go.

The important thing is the Evil Homer Syndrome was replaced by the Small Ball Phenomenon, and the Yankees won the game.

And now a word about our next opponent, the Jays, and this person.

(courtesy: torontosportsauthority.com)

Bautista will require special handling. So I ask our pitchers to watch video of him, study Joe’s charts and graphs and whatever else he’s got, or just keep the ball away from him. But do not let him beat us. Please and thank you.

Filed Under: Confessions of a She-Fan Tagged With: Blue Jays, Curtis Granderson, Derek Jeter, Ivan Nova, Jose Bautista, Luis Ayala, Mets, Yankees

The Top 10 Things I Learned Tonight

April 5, 2011

Ready?

  1. I still hate it when the Yankees lose in extra innings, even though it’s only April 5th.
  2. This team is capable of losing even when CC pitches a masterpiece.
  3. Andruw Jones might work out after all.
  4. Tex’s early-season offense is no fluke.
  5. Rafael Soriano cannot pitch in consecutive games, apparently.
  6. Boone Logan cannot pitch at all, apparently.
  7. Dave Robertson is the forgotten man in the pen, apparently.
  8. Luis Ayala is the guy Joe will go to when there’s no one else, apparently.
  9. Jeter got a hit, bringing his total to 2929, but it wasn’t the hit we needed.
  10. We are not Joe Nathan’s Daddy.

Yes, this was a tough one to swallow – literally. I was trying to eat dinner while the game went into extras and it wasn’t easy choking down the food while the Yankees coughed up the lead. With Garcia going tomorrow night and the bullpen used to the max tonight, who will pitch in the later innings besides Joba?

You really have to win games when your ace is on the mound, Yankees. Your bad. And enough with the homers. Let’s try getting some hits, which is how you create rallies.

For some reason this game really made my head explode.

(Courtesy: sodahead.com)

Update: I’m adding the 11th thing I learned tonight: Soriano doesn’t stay and talk to the media after games he blows.

Filed Under: Confessions of a She-Fan Tagged With: Andruw Jones, Boone Logan, CC Sabathia, Dave Robertson, Derek Jeter, Joe Nathan, Luis Ayala, Mark Teixeira, Rafael Soriano, Twins

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About Jane Heller

Jane Heller is a New York Times and USA Today bestselling author. Her fourteen breezy, witty novels of romantic comedy and suspense are now entertaining millions of readers around the world, along with her two books of nonfiction.

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